Fun with Telemarketers 5: Trouble with Turtle Tails

Booyah!!!

They FINALLY called again!  Those wonderful telemarketer friends of mine, oh, how I love it when they call.  As with most of the other times, this was totally adlib – which is kind of obvious as I bumble at the beginning with useless displays of idiocy.  But when the kids started crying in the background, it sparked an idea…

Enjoy!

Pills, Punkins, and a Trip to the ER

Oh. my. kids.

If I had a nickel for every time they get into something they shouldn’t, I’d be dead – buried alive in nickels.  Lunch Bucket is potty training (which could merit its own blog – not blog entry, blog).  We stayed the night last night at Jenni’s parents’ house.  They do a decent job keeping the house toddler-resistant, but toddlers find a way.  Oh, they find a way.

Lunch Bucket went and used the potty and then washed her hands, and from the kitchen I could hear that the water running, and running.  Worried that she might be flooding the bathroom, I called out to her, and Jenni went in to check on her, and found her happily washing her hands – which of itself was fine, but there were two half-dissolved acid relief pills in the sink.  Then she saw the empty bottle on the counter and a few spilled about in the shelf above the sink.  Jenni immediately began examining Lunch Bucket for signs of ingestion.  Lunch Bucket insisted she hadn’t had any.

Jenni called me in, and we looked for any evidence that she might have eaten some.  We couldn’t find any, other than the half dissolved pills (does water dissolve pills like that?) in the sink, but wanted to be sure, so we called poison control.  I think I have their phone number memorized now.  Our kids each have a record, and all their files involve ingestion: Tylenol, neon light bulb powder, diaper cream (yuck!), and now acid relief pills.  They suggested that we’d better take her into the emergency room – just in case.

Jenni took her and I stayed back with Tootles.  About ten minutes later, Jenni came back worried that perhaps Tootles might have been the culprit earlier in the day.  So off we went on our family adventure to the increasingly familiar emergency room (mind you, we’ve always had healthy, albeit very curious kids).

They started out with the typical procedures, sign in, weight check, $150 co-pay (good grief… Obama’s health plans are looking better every day).  Then we were assigned to a room.

Three hours later we were released with no signs of any problem.  Three late night hours, mind you.  Three sleep-deprived hours, with a rambunctious Tootles (have I told you of his restless tendencies at hospitals?  Or about Jenni getting yelled at by an old lady for not letting him play with the fun rattly bottles in the pharmacy?  Oh, he’s a BIG fan of hospitals…).

In the end, there was no problem.  They hadn’t taken anything.

All I can say is thank heaven for the movie Ratatouille.  Love that show.  Great for food appreciators.  Only trouble was, when we finally got home, I couldn’t go to bed before enjoying a tasty midnight snack.

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Look at those faces.  How could they NOT be up to something?

lbtrouble

Song of Middle C

song-of-middle-ctalltabIf you have ever performed in a talent show, concert, or recital, you know how much stress it can be.  And if it’s scary for adults, imagine how terribly frightening it must be for a child.  They take piano lessons, practice their little hearts out, and then do what few adults will agree to do – perform.
talltabThat’s the subject of Alison McGhee’s picture book, Song of Middle C, illustrated by Scott Menchin, and published by Candlewick Press.  It is about a little girl preparing for her first piano recital.  The poor kid works her heart out committing the music to memory, and prepares in every way she can imagine, including bowing in front of the mirror and wearing her lucky underwear!
talltabThen when she gets up to play, she freezes – the whole piece erased from her mind.  She sweats, she worries, and she nearly panics.
talltabPerhaps the story would have come to a rough ending if the girl didn’t have such a fantastic piano teacher, who taught her to not be concerned about length of time, to recognize the value of middle C, and to use her imagination.  With these tools, the little girl finds that the music itself can carry her through – even if the music she plays isn’t the music she planned!

talltabOne of the unique things about this book is that it goes into the more enjoyable parts of music.  Rather than simply following the typical pattern of ‘learn your sheet music and then play it right,’ Alison McGhee illustrates the value and power of improvisation, and how music itself can be the guide in deciding how to play and what to play.  This is a great lesson to learn – and the earlier a person can learn it the better, because when your memory fails you on stage, your emotions are still in tact (though seared slightly!), and can guide you to still make beautiful music.  Music is a thing of the heart, and Song of Middle C demonstrates that well.
talltabSong of Middle C is a fun read, and a must have for parents with young children in piano lessons.  It will help them prepare for their own recital, and teach them the power of music itself when guided by the imagination.

woodelf

talltabEven Lunch Bucket, who is only three years old, loves the book, and insisted after our first reading of it that she needs her own pair of lucky pannies!

Learn more about Song of Middle C at http://candlewick.com/cat.asp?browse=Title&mode=book&isbn=0763630136&pix=n

Song of Middle C

song-of-middle-ctalltabIf you have ever performed in a talent show, concert, or recital, you know how much stress it can be.  And if it’s scary for adults, imagine how terribly frightening it must be for a child.  They take piano lessons, practice their little hearts out, and then do what few adults will agree to do – perform.
talltabThat’s the subject of Alison McGhee’s picture book, Song of Middle C, illustrated by Scott Menchin, and published by Candlewick Press.  It is about a little girl preparing for her first piano recital.  The poor kid works her heart out committing the music to memory, and prepares in every way she can imagine, including bowing in front of the mirror and wearing her lucky underwear!
talltabThen when she gets up to play, she freezes – the whole piece erased from her mind.  She sweats, she worries, and she nearly panics.
talltabPerhaps the story would have come to a rough ending if the girl didn’t have such a fantastic piano teacher, who taught her to not be concerned about length of time, to recognize the value of middle C, and to use her imagination.  With these tools, the little girl finds that the music itself can carry her through – even if the music she plays isn’t the music she planned!

talltabOne of the unique things about this book is that it goes into the more enjoyable parts of music.  Rather than simply following the typical pattern of ‘learn your sheet music and then play it right,’ Alison McGhee illustrates the value and power of improvisation, and how music itself can be the guide in deciding how to play and what to play.  This is a great lesson to learn – and the earlier a person can learn it the better, because when your memory fails you on stage, your emotions are still in tact (though seared slightly!), and can guide you to still make beautiful music.  Music is a thing of the heart, and Song of Middle C demonstrates that well.
talltabSong of Middle C is a fun read, and a must have for parents with young children in piano lessons.  It will help them prepare for their own recital, and teach them the power of music itself when guided by the imagination.

woodelf

talltabEven Lunch Bucket, who is only three years old, loves the book, and insisted after our first reading of it that she needs her own pair of lucky pannies!

Learn more about Song of Middle C at http://candlewick.com/cat.asp?browse=Title&mode=book&isbn=0763630136&pix=n

Nahmehah! (AKA Mahnah Mahnah)

Tab flatRemember the old Muppet show with the two pink… well, whatever they were – some kind of muppets with permanent ooooh mouths, and the shaggy little guy with sunglasses that sang, “Mahna Mahna” while wandering around the stage?  Well, Lunch Bucket has the shaggy dude’s part down pat… at least the mahnah mahna part, though I think she leaves out the first “ma” leaving a nahmenah instead.

Tab flatAnyway, here’s Baba and Lunch Bucket in their premiere debut of Jim Hensen’s classic, “Mahna Mahna.”

play-button3

Mahnah Mahnah

nahmenah

Childrens Story: Mr. Johnson

I’ve mentioned my aspirations to write a Childrens book or two – well, here’s another go at it.  This one would portray a small child talking with a very old man named Mr. Johnson.  Thanks to Ezioman on flickr for the borrowed photo!

Old Man and Child

Mr. Johnson

“Mr. Johnson, I declare, haven’t you got any hair?”

“I’ve thought hard, my little scout, thought till all my hair fell out!”

“Why then are your eye’s so crinkly, why is your whole face all wrinkly?”

“Skin can slowly fold in half, each time I smile or start to laugh!”

“You don’t walk, you only hobble, when you try you start to wobble!”

“You can see all things are holy, when you try to walk more slowly.”

“Why then do your poor ears ring, so you can hardly hear a thing?”

“Greater voices that I hear, speak from the heart, not through the ear.”

“Even when you look at me, your eyes are much too dim to see.”

“The greatest things will always be, the things we do not hear or see!”

“Mr. Johnson, please reply, are you so old that you will die?”

“My child, my child, I think I might,
but everything will be alright.
Little one, come close and hear,
for death is not a thing to fear.
There came one once who made a way
so all will live again someday.
‘Follow me, and live’ He said,
and He Himself rose from the dead.
He taught us how to love and give,
he showed a better way to live.
And if we do the things we ought,
and live to follow as he taught,
then when our death comes beckoning,
our death will be a joyful thing!”

“Mr. Johnson, I don’t know, I will miss you if you go!”

“Yes, my child, I’ll miss you too, but I will still watch over you,
and when you come to join me then, we’ll be together once again!”

– Chas

Making Moments: Adventure

adventure1

TabToday Tootles and I went on an adventure! Jenni and Lunch Bucket went to a bridal shower, so Tootles and I went on an adventure while they were gone.

TabWe drove to a downtown area, where we stopped at a gardening store (my choice) and a candy store (Tootle’s choice) and bought some licorice. We also stopped at a music store (my choice), and a small park (Tootle’s choice). But I realized the adventure would be cut short when Tootles started emanating a suspiciously unpleasant scent. Unfortunately, I hadn’t brought a diaper bag.
TabSo we left after the park – but not before the part of the adventure where we discovered bear tracks! They were in the grocery store in the ice-cream section, so we took some home. Soon Tootles had bear tracks all over his face.