Thank Heaven for My Manly Bassness

I just had the awesomest phone call I think I’ve ever got – other than the telemarketer calls, anyway.
I picked up the phone and said, “Hello?”

“Hi is your husband there?”

“Uhhhh…”

“Oh, I’m sorry! Now I can tell! Sorry about that, ha, ha!”

“That’s okay, ha, ha!”

“Anyway, is your dad there?”

Momentary pause while I try to comprehend what’s going on…

“Uh, sure. Can I ask who’s calling.” (in case it’s a telemarketer)

“Yeah, this is Jane Doe (name substituted, obviously)”

“Sure, one second.”

Held the phone away to laugh as quietly as I could. Then cough a couple times to clear my throat, and then in my best manly bass voice, “Hello?”

“Hi! This is Jane Doe, I just wanted to thank you for…”

And from there on out, it was a normal call – other than my manly bassness. But that call just made my day! Best thing that’s happened to me in a long time! Hahahaha!

Fun with Telemarketers: Abducted

Wow. I think she actually believed me! Thought it took some explaining to help her understand what a black hole is, and that I was taken by aliens. I almost felt bad when she actually sounded convinced!

Fun with Telemarketers: Telemetaphysical

Telemetaphysical

“You know how I was just saying that I see ghosts? Well, I’m seeing one now.”

“Don’t worry, the bayonets won’t hurt you. They’re not physical – they’re metaphysical”

Fun with Telemarketers: Drive-Thru Conspiracy

All I can say about this one is HOLY SHAMOLY! He let me drag him on for 45 minutes! That’s by FAR my record. I recommend listening to the whole thing, but in case you’re short on time, I made an abridged – highlights only version. Either way, enjoy! And if you can put a warning out on all your social networks about the whole drive through conspiracy, I’ll be so appreciative that I might even give you a gift certificate for the Roadkill Cafe. If you’re a senior, I’ll make it for the Business After 50 Cafe.