While it’s true that I belong to the LDS church, some weeks, with the kids crawling on the bench, and the floor, and each other, and me, and the baby, I feel more like a member of the LDSF society. Not to be confused with the fundementalist church, this is the Latter-day Sunday Fiasco society. In the LDS church, the family gathers for sacrament meeting and all listen and enjoy the spirit in the meeting. But in the LDSF society, kids jump on benches, and parents do sweet sixteens up and down the chapel, racing kids in and out of the meeting, wails drowning out any and all audio reception.
Just today I woke up about halfway through the meeting (yes woke up – It was a long morning for the parents of said munchkins), I woke and discovered marker markings on my hands. What the?!
That’s when I noticed my kids coloring with markers and eating cereal next to me. Where did they get markers? We don’t even allow those in our house, let alone at church! And cereal? We had oatmeal for breakfast because we’re out of cereal!
Then the culprits revealed themselves as the kids belonging to the family sitting next to us on the bench. Ah. Well, they’re a great family, so I guess it was okay, but it did help me realize the importance of staying awake at church… especially as I remembered the marker markings and got self conscious about my face…
I only had to take Tootles out once – well, I guess you could say it was twice, since we had to go back in after he calmed down in order to fetch the diaper bag, since his foyer tantrum had released an ominous unpleasant smell. I would have had Jenni fetch it for me, but by then, she was out with another kid.
Don’t you just love Bill Nye the Science Guy? Here’s a chance to learn all you never wanted to learn about naked Molerats…
Here’s a sample from our last year Halloween party. I recommend the traditional activities – but take them to the extreme!
Next time… Extreme Pumpkin carving!
They FINALLY called again! Those wonderful telemarketer friends of mine, oh, how I love it when they call. As with most of the other times, this was totally adlib – which is kind of obvious as I bumble at the beginning with useless displays of idiocy. But when the kids started crying in the background, it sparked an idea…
Okay, so you’ve all probably heard of Celebrity look-a-likes. If you look around, you can find them everywhere. In our new neighborhood, we’ve already found Dick Van Dyke and Julie De Azevedo. In our old neighborhood, we had a perfect Mitt Romney. Patrick Swayze was one of the missionaries in my mission.
Have you ever wondered what celebrity you look like?
I don’t have to wonder.
Closing up the house for the night, I discovered a light on in the munchkins’ room. Lunch Bucket was sleeping, but where’s Tootles?
I would like to pay a special tribute at this time to a friend. He is hero of sorts. But the poor guy has one of the worst jobs in the world – he demonstrates all the horrendous things that could happen to the rest of us if we are not careful. He is the universal Stick Figure Guy. This guy is like a mix between Martin Short and Evel Knievel. Many adventures, but they NEVER go well for him.
You might have seen him around. He can be found around machinery, cleaning supplies, and just about anywhere where something can go wrong.
You might say he is always at the wrong place at the wrong time. If something goes wrong, he’s there – in fact, he’s in it. He’s the victim. Always.
Let’s look at some examples:
Somehow, Stick Figure Guy managed to… trip? For some reason he had his arms behind his back as he went down, too. I suppose the Continue reading